Dear Ate Helen, my boyfriend is a flirt. He always talks to the other agents on the floor, and we always fight about it. He told me that it’s all harmless, he just wants to have a conversation, what annoys me is that he only talks to the pretty agents, and not the regular looking ones. I don’t want to break up with him, I’m just scared that he will replace me with another girl. -Tanya, Laguna BPO
Dear Tanya, unfortunately, love advice is not my specialization, so I’m not really sure if I am the best person to help you. So I asked some of my guy friends on what they think. Here goes.
- Advice from a married man: “Do you really want to stay with someone who will make you feel this way throughout your relationship? It’s okay for guys to have women friends, but flirting, and only choosing to talk to the pretty ones, that raises a lot of red flags. There is a chance that what he says is just “harmless” turns into something serious – do you really want to have a future with someone and have this fear all the time?”
- Advice from a single guy: “Some men are just naturally flirty with women. Asking your boyfriend to hold back because what he does makes you jealous is a bit unfair. How would you feel if he asks you to stay away from guys because he constantly thinks that you will eventually break up and leave him?”
- Advice from a guy who sleeps with a lot of women (AKA, “babaero”): “Leave him. Women think they can change men, they can’t. He will always be this way, and you will always have an uneasy feeling when he talks to other girls.”
Tanya, for my part, and I say this with complete honesty, well for some reason, call center relationships tend to be really really hard to maintain. I think it’s because agents are exposed to so many people, new hires, new accounts, new teams – this leads to a situation where a guy or a girl may meet someone who is “better” that their current partner. But like I said, I am not an expert when it comes to love, god knows I’ve had quite a few failed relationships myself. Oh well, good luck and I hope you and your boyfriend figure things out. –Ate H.
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